Is it just me, or have you noticed how mean people have become in the past five to ten years? What would have never been said to someone face to face a few years ago, is now no big deal to say out loud, text, email or post on social media. I’m not perfect by any means, but I can honestly say I don’t wake up every morning thinking to myself, who can I be mean to today? I try this question instead, “Heavenly Father, who can I serve today?”

If you’ve lived long enough, I have no doubt you have experienced toxic people and relationships. Life is hard, and we never know what trials someone is going through. We can choose to be kind and possibly help someone back away from the edge of a cliff, or we can be mean and become the straw that breaks the camel’s back causing them to jump. Have you been on the edge of that cliff yourself at times in your life? I know I have, and it’s not fun! I’m eternally grateful for the friends and family who have been there for me.

One of the hardest things I’ve experienced in life is learning how to deal with and talk to toxic people. It seems there are some people in our lives that no matter what we do, it sets them off, and we are the target of their fiery darts. About a year ago, I ran across a guy on Instagram named Jefferson Fisher. Jefferson is a trial lawyer from Texas, and is one of those pleasant types of people who can put someone in their place in the kindest way, with a genuine smile on his face. He has mastered the art of fighting fire with water instead of fueling it with gasoline.

Searching for answers on how to deal with a difficult situation in my life over the past two years, I ran across Jefferson’s daily Instagram posts! He films these in his car, and ends each one with an encouraging smile and these words, “So try that, and follow me.” He was an answer to my prayers as I began practicing how to respond to toxic remarks using his suggestions and advice. Some things I had already figured out on my own, but others were enLIGHTening.

Jefferson soon added a weekly podcast you can subscribe to by email, but the biggest bonus, is the new book he wrote that has just been released! “The Next Conversation – Argue Less, Talk More” is a must read for anyone who breaths air!

I have learned so much from him, and only wish I had these communication skills in my tool box as a kid growing up! It would have made a dysfunctional family life a lot easier to navigate. His teachings on how winning an argument will most often cost you a relationship, are filled with the LIGHT of Christ! Sadly, there are some relationships that are just not healthy after all you try to do to make them work. And in those cases, distance is your friend, and that’s ok.

I initially thought Jefferson’s book would be a repeat of all the posts I’ve learned so much from on Instagram, which isn’t a bad thing. I was pleasantly surprised to see that it offers so much more! Jefferson lays out his three-part communication system, all of which can be applied to any situation.

1. Say it with control.

2. Say it with confidence.

3. Say it to connect.

Jefferson teaches that every word matters, by controlling how we communicate every day. Sometimes saying nothing at all speaks volumes in and of itself. I’ve encouraged many friends and family to follow Jefferson on Instagram @jefferson_fisher in addition to his weekly podcast at www.jeffersonfisher.com

I had a Sunday School teacher once that taught me a principle I have never forgotten. Brother Beagley taught us that good teachers, “Tell a story, teach a principle.” Jefferson does exactly this throughout his book. Personal stories are engaging and make learning interesting as they hold our attention. He is not your typical cut-throat attorney. He genuinely cares about people.

If you’re looking for a way to stay on the high road in the relationships in your life, buy his book!!! It’s an instant New York Times bestseller! I ordered mine on Amazon, it has a 5.0 review rating. https://www.amazon.com/Next-Conversation-Argue-Less-Talk/dp/0593718720 It will bring LIGHT into your life and the lives of everyone around you! You will also feel like you have a new BFF in Jefferson.

He loves Jesus, is a devoted husband and father, loves his mama, respects his elders, serves others, is kind, grateful for the blessings in his life, and down to earth – rare qualities in today’s world of people who wake up each day on the wrong side of the bed choosing who will be their next target.

We could all use a little more Jefferson in our daily lives. He radiates LIGHT! I hope you mark your book up as much as I am! It sits on my nightstand right next to my scriptures! Both are well worth the study with words of wisdom and guidance to live our lives by! Each morning when you wake up, ask yourself these two questions – What Would Jesus Do? And the next one, What Would Jefferson Do?

I hope you have a kind, LIGHT filled week!

Love Ya, Les 😊