How Many Besties Do We Need?
/Sometimes a visit with a good friend is the only therapy we need! Do you ever have one of those days, or weeks, or months, or years . . . where you just feel sad, lost, lonely, anxious, depressed, abandoned? It’s amazing what a text message, phone call, or lunch date with a friend can do for our psyche! I believe Heavenly Father gave us friends in addition to family to help us stay on the upward path, to keep putting one foot in front of the other even when we don’t feel like it! Sometimes we are the one needing the boost, and other times we are the one doing the boosting. Sometimes we are the one sharing our LIGHT, and other times we are in need of someone else’s LIGHT to brighten our days, and bring us out of that dark tunnel.
We were sent to earth for many different reasons, however, I believe that one of the main reasons we are here is to help and serve others. If you have a thought go through your mind to do something for someone, and you can do it, don’t wait! Act on it! Now! It might be something as simple as a smile, or a compliment in passing, but we never know what those around us need at that specific moment. We might just be the one who helps them back away from the cliff, and they might be the one who grabs us by the hand and pulls us back to safety. So how many friends do we really need? Social circles were shrinking even before the pandemic.
Friendships are a combination of both parties being there for each other through good times and bad. We don’t need a room full of friends to get us through life! The internet tells us, “Though research and experts suggest having three to six close friends is the sweet spot for life satisfaction, it truly depends on the individual. Ask yourself honestly whether you feel you have enough friends – that’s your answer. Focus on making these relationships positive, quality friendships to reap the benefits.”
In a New York Times article, we learn that for years, friendship in America has been in decline, a trend that accelerated during the pandemic. There are health implications to all of this. Friendship can be an important factor in well-being, while loneliness and social isolation can be associated with an increased risk for depression, anxiety, heart disease and stroke. Julianne Holt-Lunstad, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Brigham Young University, concluded that loneliness is as harmful to physical health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day!
I have always believed a “retail therapy/lunch day” with a friend is cheaper and more fun than paying to go talk to a therapist. Not that therapy and counseling doesn’t have its place in our lives, but confiding in a close friend, and being there for them to do the same is “a warm and safe place”. Spending time with our closest besties brings LIGHT to both parties, and fills our shot-gun-riddled-buckets, to get us through whatever it is we are dealing with in life.
So the next time your feeling down, call a friend. Or if you have a feeling to check on a friend, don’t wait, make the call! Plan a secret life in Salt Lake day – or whatever you do that’s fun and crazy - buy some ribbon to add to your stash, eat some yummy food, drink the Diet Coke/Dr. Pepper/ Coke Zero! All of these things are healthier than being lonely, and so much more fun!!!
As we all wade through the January drearies, let’s connect with our friends, and fill the world with some much needed LIGHT! Also, it’s not too early to start working on your Valentines for your Galentines!
Love Ya, Les :)